Film Junk’s Top 10 Gag Inducing Sex Scenes

Nail Gun Massacre

Filmmakers always talk about how awkward it is filming sex scenes. Well guess what? Sometimes it’s EQUALLY as awkward watching them! When they’re done well, they can be hot, but when placed in the wrong hands, a sex scene can be the worst viewing experience ever. I submit to you that the following 10 films contain some of the most gag inducing sex scenes ever caught on film (excluding pornography of course). Many of the films on this list are included for different reasons; some are brutal, some are awkward, and some are just plain gross. Get ready to have your mind AND your genitals blown! These are my picks for the 10 most gag inducing sex scenes. (CAUTION: Some of the following images may be considered NSFW.)

10. STAR TREK VI: THE UNDISCOVERED COUNTRY (1991)

Star Trek IV

I’ll admit it, this might be a bit of a stretch. However, I’m sure that any fan of Star Trek 6 will know exactly which scene I’m referring to here. Two words: mind meld. For the uninitiated; Spock uses his infamous mind meld technique to pry some information out of Lieutenant Valeris, a Vulcan officer who’s suspected of having some involvement in a plot to assassinate the Klingon Chancellor Gorkon. An important note: Valeris is played by none other than Kim Cattrall of Sex and the City fame! (Or for those of us who aren’t lame, Gracie Law from Big Trouble in Little China.) Although the mind meld isn’t necessarily intended as a sexual act, the actors are certainly playing it up as one. A series of disgusting moans and whimpers leave the rest of the Enterprise crew (this is all happening on the bridge in front of EVERYONE) shifting uncomfortably as they avoid eye contact and think to themselves ‘Did they just….no. Did they?’. So essentially, Spock rapes the information out of her. GAG.

9. STORYTELLING (2001)

Storytelling

Todd Solondz and the term ‘gag inducing’ probably go hand-in-hand for some people. Personally, I think he’s a genius and remains one of the few filmmakers to truly capture disgusting characters on film without it feeling completely false and written. Although Storytelling isn’t one of my favourite films of his, I wanted to include it on this list because of a certain scene that while not quite ‘gag inducing’, certainly hit a note with the ratings board. If you’ve scene the film, you probably know that I’m referring to the sexual encounter between Selma Blair’s character and the College professor she looks up to. The scene is extremely awkward, very rough, and plays out in one wide master. In order to avoid an NC-17 rating, Solondz decided to appease the MPAA by slapping a giant orange box on top of both characters, leaving the audience filling in the blanks with a little help from the grunting and expletives. According to Solondz, it was a political statement: “I was prepared to make that political statement. This is something I’ve always been prepared to do, as long as the audience is aware of what it’s not allowed to see. That’s how I feel “politically” about that.” Apparently the box originally contained the word ‘Censored’, but the MPAA ruled against it claiming that they don’t consider themselves censors. Definitely a powerful scene either way you view it and a ballsy statement on censorship by Solondz.

8. REQUIEM FOR A DREAM (2000)

Requiem for a Dream

This scene did for masturbation worthy sex scenes starring hot A-list actresses what Honey I Shrunk the Kids did for taking the love and respect of your family and friends for granted. On the one hand, you’ve got sultry, sweaty close ups of the wonderful Jennifer Connely. On the other hand, you’ve got a giant double ended dildo intercut with close ups of a sweaty, and definitely not sultry, Ellen Burstyn receiving shock treatment on her face. It’s not really the sex that makes this scene gag inducing; it’s the editing. Match cuts of Jennifer going ass to ass with a prostitute and Marlon Wayans thrusting a giant paddle in and out of a massive tub of something resembling mashed potatoes is enough to trigger reflexive gagging or possibly uncontrollable seizures. (NOTE: Keith David is particularly creepy in this scene, second only to the giant dildo.) GAG.

7. THE RETURN OF THE SWAMP THING (1989)

The Return of the Swamp Thing

There are two gag worthy moments in the sex scene (more like love scene. GAG.) in Jim Wynorsky’s ‘The Return of the Swamp Thing’. First off, when Heather Locklear finally decides to fuck a living plant man, there’s some initial hesitation on his part. He doesn’t want to disappoint. But she pushes, and he gives in and proceeds to break off a piece of his plant body and feed it to her. Pretty gross right? That’s not even the worst part. After she eats it, the camera tilts up and we enter a dream sequence — complete with vaseline on the lens — in which Locklear makes out with some muscular, second-rate Joe Montana looking goofball. The lack of plant sex is actually a little disappointing. After all, Jim Wynorsky has since gone on to direct such soft-core porn classics as ‘The Breastford Wives’, ‘House on Hooter Hill’ and ‘Bone Eater’; on all of which he’s credited as H.R. Blueberry. Nice!

6. IRREVERSIBLE (2002)

Irreversible

As far as uncomfortable, brutal rape scenes are concerned, Irreversible may hold the honour of being one of the worst. The long take, the public place, and the CG penis; all of it adds up to a visceral experience that provides the appropriate setting for the extreme violence that, in the case of the film’s backwards storytelling, came before it. Having said that, if beating someone with a fire extinguisher could be considered even remotely sexual, it would’ve been another great reason to include this film on this list. GAG.

5. THE BROWN BUNNY (2003)

The Brown Bunny

The notorious climax of Vincent Gallo’s critically maligned The Brown Bunny is…gross. I actually didn’t mind the film as a whole. It’s long, self-indulgent and pretentious, but the photography is nice and the pacing reminds me of Two-Lane Blacktop. The shitty thing is, I really don’t want to see Gallo get blown. I think Chloe Sevigny is great, but again, I don’t want to watch her blow Vincent Gallo. I’m not sure if this is the expected response to the scene. Like John Cameron Mitchell’s Shortbus (a movie I disliked so much that I don’t even want to give it the pleasure of being on this list because I feel like it would be honoured) graphic sexuality will always run the risk of stealing a story’s thunder, turning a film into a cheap thrill. Just think how many people skipped the 10 minute scene of Gallo riding his bike on a salt bed to get to the sex scene? I know Roger Ebert did. GAG.

4. I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE A.K.A. DAY OF THE WOMAN (1978)

ispit

The only thing that could’ve made The Spice Girls ‘Girl Power’ campaign all the more powerful is if the group had been previously raped, and slowly murdered their attackers in a bloody fit of revenge. In this respect, I Spit on Your Grave has the Spice Girls beat. I think the most shocking element of this film is its pacing. Seriously. Two scenes come to mind: after having been attacked, the main character Jennifer Hills slowly does the walk of shame through the woods back to her house. Literally. We pretty much see the entire walk. In another scene, she circles one of her attackers in a speedboat…for a very long time. Eventually she hits him with an axe, which begs the question; why not cut down the circling and spend more time showing her hit the guy with the axe?? DUH! I won’t say these scenes don’t work though. For some reason the pacing adds to the brutal realism. One of the more memorable scenes of the film that secured a spot on this list finds Jennifer convincing one of her attackers to join her for a sensual bathing session. Little does he know, a giant f-ing knife is within her reach and just when he’s starting to feel good, she cuts his dick off. Seriously. Buzzkill and GAG.

3. NAIL GUN MASSACRE (1985)

nailgun

Of all of the ridiculous shit that goes on in Nail Gun Massacre, there’s one thing that’s just too real for its own good; the sex scene. More specifically, the sex scene where the hairy dude pummels the chick against a tree in the middle of the woods. It’s hard to pinpoint what exactly makes this scene gag inducing, but it may have something to do with the caliber of performers involved. The cast is made up of non-actors who are either friends of the directors, or F-listers looking for their big break. In this case, the guy with his pants around his ankles apparently ended up being served divorce papers for what director Terry Lofton says ‘is as close as you can get’ to actual on screen sex. Afterall, he should know. He was the lucky guy who got to lay underneath these people holding a tube and a syringe, awkwardly waiting to pump blood through a discreetly hidden tube as their genitals rub against each other right in his face. GAG.

2. PINK FLAMINGOS (1972)

Pink Flamingos

Transvestite (playing mother) + dirty hippy (playing son) + blow job x incest = GAG.

1. THRILLER A.K.A. THEY CALL HER ONE EYE (1974)

oneeye

In Liam Neeson’s latest film ‘Taken’, his character sets out on a mission to save his daughter who has been kidnapped and forced in to sex slavery. The bad guys keep the girls in control by getting them hooked on drugs, and Neeson uses his CIA training to track down the culprits and punch them in their faces with books. Minus a few minor differences, this is the exact plot of Bo Arne Vibenius’ Swedish revenge picture ‘Thriller’; otherwise known as ‘They Call Her One Eye’. The minor differences? Replace Neeson’s professionally trained CIA agent with a revenge thirsty, eye patch wearing female victim (her eye was cut out as punishment by her pimp), taking it upon herself to learn the fine art of killing on her own time and her own dime. Nothing beats a shotgun blast to the chest in EXTREEEEMMMMEEEE slow motion. As for the gag inducing sex? Eight words; Close up of male ejaculate on an ass hole. Sorry, nine words. Is asshole one word? Eight words. Either way, you won’t find that in a Liam Neeson film. GAG.

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  • D.
  • Eric J

    Good discussion and list. I’m surprised nobody mentioned any of the slew of pretty twisted scenes from a pretty nasty little film called “Crash”. No, not the one that won the Oscar few years ago (tho that had some cringeworthy scenes for other reasons!) but the traffic accident loving James Spader flick. Noteworthy for Rosanna Arquette mutalation sex scenes(and plenty more sickening couplings). Was ashamed at my occasional boner during viewing!

  • devo

    Ok list but you do let yourself down with the shortbus comment – a great film.

  • trks

    Nothing, NOTHING I say, either in the list or the comments below is as awkward, uncomfortable and gag inducing as Joe Pesci making out with Sharon Stone in Casino. Jesus, people.

  • PaLibre

    Thank you,thank you, … and thanks again for the Top 10 Gags and all the comments following that listed a library of flicks I’ve now downloaded or found at Amazon … I’ve got lots of new guilty pleasure time in front of the TV.

  • http://greynoisemedia.net James Eric Laczkowski

    David Cronenberg’s “Crash” (1996)… James Spader fucking Rosanna Arquette’s leg scar.

    How can that NOT be on this list, fellas :)

  • JH

    Hahaha! Wow. This is some list.

    I would like to submit the narrowly-averted woman-duck action in “Howard the Duck” (1986) as a runner-up. It wasn’t nearly as disturbing as most of what is listed here, but Leah Thompson almost getting down with a midget in a duck suit deserves a place on any list of incredibly awkward sex scenes.

    (Love that movie, by the way — SO bizarre!)

  • Jason

    Worst sex scenes ever occur in the film Anatomy of Hell. A movie about sex with these two gems..

    Woman takes her blood soaked tampon out in front of her gay friend and puts it in a glass of water and then…yep..drinks it.

    Same gay friend goes to her shed gets a folding garden tool and slides the wooden handle into her vagina while she’s sleeping and leaves it there…she wakes up to see a tool sticking out of her with a nonchalant expression.

  • http://breakfast-cereals.us cereal

    Oh!I Love It.
    Best Classic Movies.

  • Dobhar Chu

    I know its yeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaars to late for an addition, but Demolition Man. Just for Sylvester Stallones sex grunts.

  • http://www.baldmosher.com baldmosher

    There’s that old adage that sex scenes are only any good until you ‘finish off’. Nobody ever watched a full porno in one sitting.

    However, it’s not true of Deliverance – the end of that scene is worth sticking around for. Classic work.

    Oldboy was a pretty good shout but there was something really sweet about that scene before you found out the truth, and then you didn’t really mind as they were such a good couple.

  • equator

    Wow nice crowd here..

    How could u not mention “Ken Park”.. (larry clark is the master), its the movie with disturbing sex scene all over it.

    The worst of course is the scene where the father’s drunk n try to give his own son a blow job..
    oh please!!

    its a strong movie though.

  • http://inte robi ul

    potoas

  • GOD

    How about that Susan Sarandon scene where she’s getting topless while being photographed and there’s 13 year old girl whose part of the photo shoot? Anybody knows this film?

  • projectgenesis

    GOD, I think you are talking about Pretty Baby (Malle, 1978)

  • Nate K

    Anti-Christ… #1

  • Rich

    “Salo” (or 120 Days of Sodom) is essentially one long, gag inducing sex scene.

    Then there’s “In the Realm of Sense” where a woman imposes so much sex on a man he dies. Then she cuts his dick off.

    or “Entrail of a Virgin” where a Japanese swamp zombie fists a woman with a severed arm and after getting her off tears the armour through her stomach.

  • jack

    this film shud band!!!!!

  • Mark Grant

    Man, this list is hilarious but that comment about the Joe Pesci and Sharon Stone sex scene in “Casino” had me on the floor. That scene always bothered me. Also the scene in “Don’t Look Now” with a weird and super skinny/pale Donald Sutherland having sex with his wife for like 20 minutes cross cut with the next morning always kind of made me gag. I agree with this list that the scenes in Thriller are the most gag inducing sex scenes ever put on film.

  • Rach

    I agree that Salo was truly gag-unducing. The whole film. But “sex scene”? To imagine that Salo had a sex scene is indeed gag inducing. I gave away my copy and never want to see it again.

  • mmm

    i need video of these 10 flims as a single collection

  • Allison

    I think you missed the point of the scene in “Requiem.” It wasn’t supposed to be erotic. It was supposed to be gag-inducing. Maybe you wanted it to be erotic, but the director wanted you to feel the horror of how all the characters’ lives had turned out. Seeing the horror on Connelly’s face as she goes through something painful and humiliating in front of a crowd of cheering, heartless people, is not meant to be erotic at all except to sick people such as those in the crowd of the movie scene. Even though she was there because of the poor decisions she made in her life, it was still not meant to be laughed at or seen as erotic.

  • http://www.thedocumentaryblog.com Jay C.

    OHHHHHHhhhhh. I thought it was supposed to be erotic.

    Thanks for the clarification Allison!

    Cya.

    j

  • Dekker451

    If you think the scenes from Irreversible, Requiem For A Dream and Star Trek VI were not only not sexy but even “gag inducing” then you’re probably gay.

  • demo

    hey guys i think it must be ‘hard’ no pun intended, to make sex scenes, more so if there is no chemistry between them, its ok for the guy, but what if the guy was to get hard, how could they carry on doing the scene.

    i hated that sex scene in ‘irreversible’ that was gross, and how such a beautiful actress like Monicia agreed to play that part is beyound me. she has to be one of the most beautiful actress around at the moment, would love to see her in action in a porn movie.

  • rey

    9 songs

  • SRB

    “Close up of male ejaculate on an ass hole.” Really? That’s gag worthy to you? What a fucking prude.

  • harley

    dude what kind of sex scenes do you like seeing the more real the better and hope like fuck there not those dumb shit romance love scenes nothing better than seeing some dude blow a load on a chick. thats the biggest problem with single “x” movies you dont get to see the money shot whats the point. also my wife is tired of seeing limp dick in rated r films show some real hard onces for once and dude star trek 6 thats not even a real sex scene i saw that movie when i was like 10 and both of my younger children have scene it its nothing special maybe if he wipped his cock out and shoved it down here throut that would have been different but dude your talking 1 of the best scifi movies ever made not just a great star trek movie but just a dam fine scifi movie plus talking about sex scenes that are bad how about the crying game that scenes was wacked besides that can sex scenes be bad if the induce a hard on they must be good hell thats what there for thats what we went to the movie for in the 80′s ever slasher flick had to have tits and ass thats what we went for plus seeing kevin bacon get killed by jason

  • courty

    Harley, congratulations. Your post is the most gag inducing sex scene on this page. Punctuation is fun. Try it.

    Fantastic list… I can’t think of any other scenes that haven’t been mentioned. Well, except for the scene in Otik where the little girl seduces the old man so he’ll come near and get eaten by a giant, terrible tree monster in a diaper. Not an actual sex scene, I suppose, but it’s still quite uncomfortable to watch.

  • inthislastbreath

    I’ll second “Don’t Look Now”…Donald Sutherland and Julie Christie enclenched in this desperate, pale, bony horizontal grapple. Both of them needed pasta or a couple of sandwiches or something. “Nailgun Massacre” — could this guy not have his back hair shaved the day of the shoot? And the cringe inducing adult underoos on the guy in “They Call Her One Eye”.

  • Shawnson Jeckels

    Jay C, I am not sure how Shortbus can warrant that much hate. I know it isn’t for everyone, but it truthfully seems like one of the more well-intended movies put ou in the last 10 years and by that I mean it wasn’t political, the sex was overt but it never came across as exploitive to me, and it was a sweet goodhearted movie. had trouble reading your post after that comment. oh and im sorry your fucking jennifer connelly fantasies were tainted by so much deprecation and drug dependency.

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